Perfect Humans

Sharia Law — Muhammad Gets Down to the Nitty-Gritty





There is a point of view that is accepted with unthinking conventional reverence among Muslim societies, and that is Sharia Law, an Arabic term for Islamic Law, which stipulates the rules and regulations presumed to have been divinely revealed in the Qurán that today is the ordained way of life for all Muslims.


Literally, Sharia means pathway. For the older folk, it meant; a way to the ole' watering hole in the middle of the desert. Since, at the time of writing, when the Qurán first rolled off the presses, most Arabs lived in the desert and were keen to the ways of the sun and sand, water was very important, as was the knowledge of direction. It was very easy to get lost in the desert. Muslims treated law with that same philosophy and applied it to their everyday life. 


The Qurán explains that Allah gave the universe certain laws called Sunna. The laws that were set down by his Prophets are called Sharia. Since both basically come from the same source, one cannot exist without the other, so Muslims accept both, what Allah says in the Qurán and what the Prophet Muhammad and others have said in the Hadiths'.


Sharia law encompasses criminal, military and economic laws, theological obligations and pilgrimage, who and when you can marry, what you can and cannot eat, either halal (lawful) or haram (unlawful), what you can wear, especially women, which foot you should use when you first step into and out of a bathroom. 


When leaving the toilet one should say a prayer aloud, for all to hear,



"O Allah! Bestow your forgiveness upon me, for I have shat."


In Sharia law there is no talking while going to the bathroom, it dictates which direction a man should direct his pee (Qibla), and whether or not to use toilet paper or ones fingers. From brushing your teeth the Muhammad way, to the taboo of getting urine on your skin and clothing especially during prayers, even how-to instructions on clipping the moustache, nails, circumcising, and even a lesson on how to fart. There's much said about the menstrual cycle and sex, mostly negative. 


Welcome to the world of Sharia Law, where a man named Mohammad got down to the Nitty-Gritty, telling what he liked and didn't like, eventually turning it into law. 


Watch for it, soon to be coming to a mosque near you, if not already. The penalties are heavy, one could lose ones head over Sharia Law.










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