Perfect Humans

Six Sleeping Positions — What Type of Sleeper Are You?





Which position do you sleep in? Are you a Womb Dweller, a Logger, a Soldier, a Free Faller or a plain, boring Starfish? The way you sleep—according to Professor Chris Idzikowski, the director of the United Kingdom Sleep Assessment and Advisory Service—can tell a lot about you. More than you think. This is a compilation of his list. It should interest Tarot Card Readers, Astrologers, Mystics Fortune Tellers, and Horoscope Writers should take note. A lot can be said about the way a person sleeps.






STARFISH POSITION


1) Only about five percent (5%) of us sleep in the Starfish Position. That's on our backs, or our stomach, spread eagle and arms outstretched above your neck. Feet hanging the bottom of the mattress and our hands hanging off the sides. As the position looks, it seems inviting! If you sleep in this position then you would make someone a good friend, ready to listen to everyone who has a complaint. People just can't help but love you. You are candid and open. A very agreeable person. People trust you. You're the first to jump in and lend a hand, but usually you get in the way, but you're so damn adorable people forget about how clumsy you really are or they overlook it. Control freaks really love this type of person, you're willing to do anything. If you sleep with a Dominatrix, you'd be wearing the dog collar. At the prom, you are the type no one asks to dance. You're always seeking attention even though you are a wallflower, introverted and prefer to stay out of the lime-light. Let's face it. You're just plain boring.


FREE FALLERS


2) Seven percent (7%) of us are free fallers, luckily not that many. They lay on top of a pillow hugging it with both arms, held firmly and securely in position. This type of person is brassy, bossy, and brash, argumentative and edgy. They hate people telling them what to do. Oh, what the hell, they hate people in general. You won't find this type of person in a crowd that's for sure. They might be cat or dog lovers, which make them appear compassionate to humans but don't believe it! They'll volunteer down at the local SPCA but never at the FOOD BANK. They're too proud for that! Don't ask them for a dime, or their time, they have those either, but they pretend they do. They usually have big SUV's, parked in the garage unable to drive them because they can't afford the gas.

* Warning* Never try to take a teddy bear, a snuggly blanket or a pillow from a baby that is a Free Faller, especially if it is hugging it this way. You'll regret it when they hit their teen years.


SOLDIERS


3) These strong men/women lie on their backs, as if at attention, hands directly down at their sides. Eight per cent (8%) of us sleep this way, heads straight up, as if dead lying in a coffin, hands held together over the heart. They pull the blankets high up, under their necks. If you have a secret these guys will keep it, They snore, and because of that usually sleep alone in a twin bed or in their own bedroom, near the front door. After all, they are soldiers born to serve and protect and have high standards. They expect respect, and we give it to them. Don't mess with this type of sleeper. If he sleepwalks, or snores, let him. They don't like surprises. You could end up getting your head shot off.




YEARNERS


4) Thirteen per cent (13% sleep on their sides, with both arms extended out in front, as if at the ready to keep anyone that comes within her space, at bay. These people are confusing, you don't know if they are reaching out for you to come near (watch out) or blocking you (more likely) like a football lineman. They are the suspicious type, they never really trust you and are always asking you, "And how do you know that?" Which makes you not want to trust them. Don't get me wrong, they good people and have an open nature and heart but they just can't make a decision if their life depended on it and if they do, it's no use arguing with them or trying to change their decision, even if they have could have made a better choice. They'll never admit being wrong. Men that sleep like yearners, we call them stubborn. Women we call something else. I'm a gentleman.


LOGGERS


5) The loggers. These sleepers make up 15% of the population. They lie on their sides with their arms down at their sides. Some might even have an arm under the pillow propping up their head. These guys can be so easy going and sociable you wonder sometimes if they're not drunk. They can sleep anywhere, anytime and are the hardest to arouse. You can spot a logger immediately by his bed hair in the morning or the drool that hangs down from the corner of his lip to the surface of the pillow. Yes, you've just discovered where those stains have come from. On the dance floor, he's the guy that can't dance but doesn't realize it and still dances. They play cards a lot, cribbage. They bowl and drive big cars. They're the life of any party. Beer drinkers and good targets for con-artists.



WOMB DWELLERS or FOETUS (Fetus)


6) Most of us (41%) are womb dwellers, and that includes me. We sleep in the most common of sleep positions. We are tough on the outside but sensitive on the inside. At least we pretend to be. We retreat into the fetal position curling up to anything that will let us, sometimes to things that won't, much to our dismay. We are shy at first meeting new people, especially sleeping with them, pyjamas or not, but just until we get warmed up. Then look out! It's ironic, twice as many women as men sleep as womb dwellers. 


I won't even mention the thumb suckers that are put into the same category as womb dwellers. Nor, people that sleep with their eyes open, in a category all their own. 


Not today anyway, that's another blog.




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Dog Brindle






Ref: 20 Things you didn't know about everything.













1 comment:

Paula Catlover said...

"The way you sleep reveals your hidden personality."
There's no comma in that sentence.

The way you sleep reveals which position you're most comfortable sleeping in. That's it. Unless you're hostile or afraid of who you're sleeping with, then maybe some extra sticking out or curling up.

Spirit World